HIT THE BOOKS- (TOOLS TO SHIFT PERSPECTIVE)

The #shiftingperspective series is an unscientific compilation of the tools, 

attitudes or approaches that have supported my journey to becoming whole-hearted, 

awake, and not controlled by my trauma.

You can read the first installment here:  Meet Your Maker

Attitude is a very important tool that can take you towards or away from any goal.
The attitude I have towards learning can make a major difference in whether 
or not I am able to become something different.

When we're little, our minds and hearts are like little sponges, ready and able 

to soak up any information that comes along.

Somewhere along the way, we decide that because we've mastered

 certain skills, we don't need to learn as much anymore.

We decide that because we know how to do one thing, 
we don't need to learn how to do others.

By the time we're adults, most of us have slowed the 

learning down to a trickle, barely experiencing the world in new ways

or being challenged by new information.

It's why they say it's hard to teach an old dog new tricks-

not because the old dog CAN'T learn or is dumb

but because the older dog thinks it already KNOWS everything.

It is next to impossible to shift your perspective to something new 

if you think that you already know everything about everything. 

If you want to change, then it's important to adopt the attitude of a student.

Intentionally accept that you don't actually know how to be different 

already and open yourself up to learning.

Sometimes it's hard to resist knowledge potential.....even when you're not in that class anymore

Waaaay back in the early 2000's, I decided that I wanted to be an excellent cook.

Not a professional chef (probably) but definitely a person who had mastered techniques,

had the ability to create meals that were memorable, and was competent in the kitchen. 

Most of all, I wanted to please my own demanding palate.
I had been cooking on some level since I was 10 years old but I decided
that there were things to learn and that I was going to learn them.

I studied everything I could get on the subject of cooking and used every available

 avenue to acquire this information:  cooking shows, youtube videos, 

blogs and all the cookbooks. 

I did not focus on one flavor profile, style, or food. 

I picked up anything that interested me and absorbed it. 

From a book on pioneer cooking (actual recipes from the 1700s) to flashy
fluff written by reality TV chefs-

I read cookbooks like novels at night, marking anything that looked interesting

for weekend kitchen attempts.

I tried out thousands of recipes and hundreds of techniques.

I took some classes led by experienced professionals.

I practiced by myself and with friends who were like minded and better cooks than me.

I spent 10 years mastering something-immersing myself in a sea of information so that

I understood the rules, the science, and the areas where I had been under-achieving.
I practiced, failed, and tried again.

I learned from other people's broad experience

before I knew how to do it myself.
I trusted that something about a particularly complicated technique or 
flavor combo worked because it had worked for someone else.

Over a decade in, I can operate in a kitchen

in a way that would lead you to believe I never had to work at it.

I make it look easy-when it was actually a slow, messy slog.

Lemons into lemonade....

A few years ago, I decided that I was going to become a more integrated, healed person.

I was going to figure out what would help me thrive as a person, understand why I 

behaved in certain ways, and break the cycle of dysfunction that was 

laid down for me as a child.

I might as well have set myself the goal of learning to breathe underwater

given my understanding of the world, my life experience to date and my perspective.

I was a people pleasing, perfectionist, over-achiever who looked outside of 

myself for all of my value.

How on earth was I going to become someone who was healthy and integrated?

I basically applied a similar attitude towards my goal of personal growth that
 I applied to cooking.

I became a student again.

Learning new things is hard but it is not impossible. 

The attitude of a student allows me to admit that I'm inadequate or lost in an area

 so that I can open myself up to learn.

I read voraciously, listen to podcasts, utilize social media, and talk to anyone

who will engage with me on the subject.

I have no judgement or aversion to a particular teacher-

every book or podcast will teach me something.

From Wayne Dyer to Dr. Laura, Rumi to Rob Bell, Oprah to Rachel Hollis-

I've got a hundred teachers who have been invaluable in shifting my perspective.

I read books and then I read their references and indexes to get my next reading list.

I jot down notes when podcast speakers share what material 
or thought leader inspired them.

I go to conferences, I take classes, I ask other people what has helped them.

Having the attitude of a student allows me to take all of this in without
 feeling the need to qualify it,

justify it, or worry about how it might be sticking to me.

What I've noticed is that when I'm reading material around healing, self-help or even just physical health-I can have all kinds of crap roll up into my lizard brain.

Resistance is real-particularly when it hits you in your tender spots.

The first time I read a book that told me I'd need to take some personal responsibility for the wounds I inflicted on myself because of my trauma, 
I wanted to scream at the author that NONE OF THIS IS MY FAULT.
I could have stopped right there, put down the books and decided to throw in the towel.
If I am in my ego, in my feelings, feeling smart and like an expert-I likely will.
If I have the attitude of a student, I can accept that the teacher is sharing something 

they believe to be important and useful.
I can hold some space for the message and resist the urge to categorize 
information as valid or invalid, useful or wasteful, for me or not.

There are lots of things that I've learned as a student that don't become 

useful later in life (for instance- calculus equations for calculating the path of a parabola

 or the bleak descriptions of the sea in Moby Dick) but that doesn't mean they

 aren't true or useful in someone's life or weren't a good use of my time in the moment.

Having the attitude of a student lets me absorb the information and place it on a shelf until I am capable of deciding whether it will be useful to me in particular.

In case you're interested, I've created some Pinterest boards with resources to books and podcasts that have been useful on my particular journey so far.  
You can find it here:  Shifting Perspective Resources

I'd love to hear any recommendations from you for books, teachers or even memes that have helped you along your own path.