The Resistance is Real (but not futile)

I'm experiencing resistance in large amounts right now.

Do you know about resistance?

It's the way the universe (or you or your family or...) rises up to block your efforts to be different, change or grow.

It's a proven phenomenon.

Don't believe me?  

Commit to giving up doughnuts and they will 

literally form a parade line in front of you.

Decide you're going to the gym every day after a lifetime 

of avoiding it and you will lose your gym bag, 

have your car break down on the way there or 

even become injured to the point of being unable to work out.

Changing habits that have formed over decades is more than hard.

The easiest thing to do is always the thing that you've already done.
New habit and new thought patterns are new programming.
You have to stick with something for a long time to get 
the old wiring to stop firing and the new wiring to become the default.
While this rewiring is taking place, resistance comes on sneaky feet- 

reinforcing your old habits and trying to prevent the new one from forming.

It's frustrating, sometimes heartbreaking, 

often infuriating and an excellent sign.

Resistance is an invitation to wrestle with who you're becoming, 

an opportunity to see whether you want to go to the 

new place MORE THAN you want to stay in the old place.

I have some really big goals for this life and I'm definitely making progress.....

but it's a big fight with myself to make this progress.

Resistance shows up for me in the form of busyness-
usually work that I like or don't mind doing
but work that isn't essentially mine.
I get busy and then I loose focus on the place I'm going.
It's easy for me to forget to care for myself physically if I'm over-committed.
Miss a gym work out here, have a sweet treat over there.
After a few mis-steps, it would be easiest to just quit trying to change.
To go back to the old patterns of how I have lived for 40 years.
Or to lie to myself by saying that it's not resistance, that I'm just busy.

Really busy.

Too busy to change.

That's not what is happening because I have finally found a bigger why
than external conformity or validation.
I am doing all this change for myself.

Each step that I take moves me closer to the 
path of the woman I am becoming-and she is pretty darn special.

A woman who thrives.

A woman who writes and speaks about her own experiences.

A woman who holds space for other women and men 
while they wrestle with themselves.

A woman capable of giving grace-
to herself, to her family, to her friends, to her enemies.
That woman is my bigger why and the love of her is the reason I keep
managing to push through to new perspective.

I'm thankful to be aware of the resistance-
to not call it the old labels I used to have for it.

I'm thankful to realize that the changes I'm making are the reason 
for the water being churned up around me-
sometimes so violently that I can't actually see which way to go.

I'm in awe of my own strength and perseverance-
which is really the fruit of this journey.

I will do it.
I can do it.

I am doing it!

So what's the point of this post? 
Mostly I just wanted to say that if you're experiencing hardness
in the face of your dreams then you're on the right path.
If you want to do what you've always done, then that will be easy.
Keep doing it.
If you want to change to something new-then resistance is the proof
that you're doing it, that you're changing or at least on the right path.
Keep going.